Relationship Combatibility Factors
Relationship and Marriage counseling can assist you find out how suitable you are.
The two most crucial factors that determine how compatible you are as a couple are:
A similar level of psychological vitality and maturity and a similar ranking of Instinctual Variants.
What are Instinctual Variants?
The 3 Instincts represent the natural energies or drives that are inherently part of us as humans. Our personality is highly engaged with and is often dependent on these libidinal, instinctual energies to give it its spark.
Self Preservation Instinct.
People of this Instinctual type are preoccupied with the basic existential needs as they translate into our contemporary society, for example, finance, food, housing, health, safety and comfort.
Being safe and physically comfortable are essential, and they will often bring their supplies with them.
When entering a room, they will tend to notice lighting, uncomfortable chairs, the room temperature, when the lunch break will be, and whether they will like the food provided. They also tend to be the most practical in the sense of taking care of important life necessities.
They are the most introverted of the types.
Sexual/ Intimate Instinct.
People of this variant have a strong desire for intensity of experience and affection. The honest riveting gaze is the dead giveaway. When they enter a situation they automatically gravitate toward people they feel attracted to, as if they are looking for the juice. These people can turn into intimacy junkies, often neglecting pressing obligations or even basic maintenance if they are swept up in something that has captivated them. This gives a expansive exploratory approach to life, but can also generate a lack of focus on one’s own achievements.
Social Instinct.
People of this variation are preoccupied on their interactions with others and with the sense of value and self esteem they derive from their participation in collective activities. These include work, relationships, side activities and clubs.
Upon entering a room, these people would immediately be aware of the power structures and subtle politics between different people and groups. They are subconsciously focused on other’s reaction to them, particularly about whether they are being accepted or not.
They need to connect with others to feel secure, alive and energised. They seem to enjoy interacting with people, but they avoid intimacy.
They are the most extroverted of the types.
Within a person, one of these three Instincts will dominate. In fact these 3 instincts can be ranked liked the sections of a cake, with the most predominant one at the top. The least powerful one, at the bottom, is termed the blind spot.
These instincts play an essential role in our relationships because people of the same type tend to share values to understand each other innately, and therefore feel very compatible.
In relationships between 2 different Instinctual types, each will struggle to convert the other.
For further information on discovering whether you and your partner are compatible, contact the Hart Centre Australia. We are Australia’s premier relationship and marriage counselling service with 53 locations Australia wide, and 8 relationship counselling centres in Brisbane, 3 marriage counselling centres in the Gold Coast, and 2 relationship counselling locations on the Sunshine Coast. Phone 1300 830 552 for appointments at all centres.
For relationship counselling Brisbane, marriage counselling gold coast and marriage counselling sunshine coast, contact your local Hart Centre.
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